Humor: The New Big 2 in LA

The following is an “interview” conducted with Steve Blake, back up point guard of the LA Lakers.

So Steve, how have you felt about all the big moves this off-season.

I haven’t felt the electricity like this since I was dishing the rock to Juan Dixon for the ‘Terps. The town is buzzing like Josh Hamilton before he found God. I just hope me and Stevey Nash can live up to all the hype.

…I’m sorry what hype?

Apparently you haven’t heard the news. The Steve’s are the biggest thing to hit LA since Fernando-mania. It’s been the big news of the off-season, where have you been. “Take it or Steve it, Laker’s 2012.” How have you not heard of this?

Most of the talk around the team has been on the Dwight Howard trade. What are your thoughts on that?

Are you serious right now? How is that the biggest story of the off-season. We traded a immature 7′ ft. black dude for a douchey 6’11 black dude. I would call that a downgrade. We have 2 white point guards named Steve running the back court. What are you not getting here? The only way this could get better is if we had “The Professor”  playing the 2.

And how could you even get excited about the Dwight deal. We didn’t even dump Pau “The Stink” Gasol. The man single handedly confirmed every olfactory based stereotype about Europeans. I was once in a hotel room with him and his brother and I think I technically died for 3 minutes.

Does Steve Nash know about this?

Well, no, not yet. He’s doing Canadian things like being socialist or curling. But, I’ve made “Steve me out of this” T-Shirts for when Ron Artest predictably goes crazy. And no, I don’t call him by his stupid made up name because calling mentally unstable people by a made up name is how Manson grade insanity is created. I’m done with this interview. You just don’t “Steve my vision”..

Steve my vision doesn’t make any sense…

Ughh…Back to the drawing board. I guess this is what the off-season is for.

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