My Hate for Josh Hamilton Burns Like the Heat of a Thousand Suns

Josh Hamilton missed the 5 games recently due to vision problems via, what he calls, “too much caffeine.” Hamilton blames his recent vision problems on drinking an energy drink before games and eating a chocolate bar after them. Really, Josh Hamilton? We are talking about the same Josh Hamilton who did Goodenesque levels of cocaine, enough booze to kill a pony, and finished a 4 year bender with an invigorating period of daily crack use while living on the street. This is the same Josh Hamilton who went to rehab 5 different times in order to get sober. And now a Hershey bar is killing him? We’re sure this isn’t the after effects of enough drug use to make for a very sad episode of Intervention. I would be 0% surprised if there was more to this story and that attitude is why the Rangers refuse to give him an extension and every other team is scared to pursue signing him. No one has any confidence that he will stay sober, nor really should they.

Josh Hamilton is what the Germans call a “Scheisskopf”. Josh Hamilton is not some wild inspiration or a tale of the healing powers of religion.  The narrative we cast upon Hamilton is that he came back through hard work and dedication. Nope. Josh Hamilton came back because Josh Hamilton is not you or I.

In high school Josh Hamilton, was called “the best prospect since Alex Rodriguez.” In his senior year, he hit .529 with 13 HR’s in 25 games and threw a 96 mph fastball. 5 years of bafflingly heavy drug use, stretches of homelessness, and not playing baseball followed. 2 years after his foray into drugs, he made his rookie debut and 3 years later became an All-Star. This is because Josh Hamilton was born to play baseball. Not because he worked hard or treated his body well (crack, booze, you get the picture.) If Josh Hamilton can still be the MVP then everything I’ve learned in health class is a sham. Josh Hamilton is not a normal human being and therefore judging him like one of us is silly. This is not some uplifting tale, this is a guy who destroyed his body with drugs and alcohol yet, was given natural gifts that transcend crack cocaine and the such. Hamilton is the antithesis to Rudy. He personifies everything that is flawed and ridiculous in telling an mediocre athlete they can make it to the pros if they try hard. Everyone should try hard in theory but when it comes down to it, there will always be people like Hamilton who are just born to do certain things and they will succeed at those things no matter how hard they try to mess it up. I want to live in a society where we can admit that and not feel the need to craft uplifting shennanigans to make great E:60 segments.